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“You never forget your first love” is a common phrase that seems to reign true for most people. Many have experienced first love at a young age, where such new feelings are both sensational, yet puzzling. First love can come in many forms, and while some are cute and innocent on the surface, others seem far more complicated. September 18th marked National First Love Day, and anime is the perfect genre to dive into when it comes to the first love trope. It is a theme commonly used in a lot of anime not only to satisfy viewers but to move the plot along as well. Anime tends to portray first love as more than a simple crush, but something that has a much greater significance down the line.
Soulmates: Taiga And Ryuji (Toradora)
Toradora is a feel-good romantic comedy that has most, if not all of the favorite tropes of a classic shojo anime (a genre of anime/manga targeted mostly towards young girls/women that involve romance and/or drama driven plot). First love is a very common trope in shojo anime, and Toradora is no exception. The show itself is a little over ten years old, but it still manages to stay fresh and connect with viewers on a fun, yet personal level. Toradora touches on real-life situations and multiple angles of high school love — from crushes, pining, unrequited love, and the experience of unexpected first love.
The series introduces Ryuji Takasu, a misunderstood 16-year-old high school student who is trying to find his place in life. Ryuji’s life is flipped upside down after he meets fiery classmate Taiga Aisaka, also known as the “Palmtop Tiger” by classmates due to her small 4’7 stature. The two take an immediate dislike to one another at first, as they seem like complete opposites in nearly every way. Despite their complete differences, one thing that they share is that neither of them has experienced first love.
A bombshell is dropped when Ryuji discovers that not only does Taiga live directly next door to him, but that her best friend is the very girl that Ryuji has a crush on. In turn, Ryuji discovers that Taiga has a crush on his own friend as well, and the two make an agreement to set each other up with their respective crushes. This often leads to their own plans to hook each other up constantly backfiring on them.
Though Ryuji initially had a negative first impression of Taiga, she begins to grow on him to the point where he legitimately cares about her and her wellbeing. He continuously goes out of his way to care for her, such as cleaning her dirty apartment, making her school lunches, and having home-cooked meals with her. He even protects Taiga from bullies and embarrassing situations at school, whether she asks for his help or not.
A Distorted View Of Love
Ryuji and Taiga grew up in different types of households, but circumstances from both have left them with a skewed view of love and the real world. As Taiga grew up with everything constantly being handed to her, it leads her to develop a spoiled-like complex. Meanwhile, Ryuji often had to go without and became the man of his household at a very young age.
A Spoiled Child With Absent Parents
Taiga consistently whines and complains to Ryuji about frivolous things and has violent outbursts when she is angry or when things don’t quite go her way. Ryuji is the exact opposite as he is frugal, yet still tries to find the silver lining of a difficult situation. Taiga often expresses her dislike for most people, including her absent parents, while Ryuji believes that those types of relationships are important.
Taiga’s loud and brash nature could very well be due to feeling small; not just physically, but emotionally. Despite growing up well-off, Taiga still deals with the negative effects and feelings of growing up in a broken home and not being properly heard. She comes off as rude to protect herself from more disappointment and heartbreak. As the series goes on, viewers see a completely different side to the Palmtop Tiger; somebody who is much more tender-hearted and kinder than what is seen on the surface. Taiga is simply trying to find where she belongs in the world, much like Ryuji.
A Teenager Taking On A Parental Role
Ryuji seems more put together than Taiga on the surface but in actuality deals with deeper problems of his own that people don’t often see. Because Ryuji’s father abandoned his mother before he was born, he grew up with no father figure in his life. This left Ryuji to take on the role of the household caretaker from a young age as his single mother worked multiple jobs to take care of them both.
Despite his outward feelings, Ryuji doesn’t seem to know how to feel about the matter regarding his late father. Ryuji gets abnormally upset with Taiga when she refuses to want anything to do with her own father. Though Taiga expresses to Ryuji that her father has hurt her in more ways than one, Ryuji pushes her to try and make amends simply because he is her father. In the instance with Taiga’s father, Ryuji had been subconsciously trying to live vicariously through Taiga and her relationship with him, regardless of Taiga’s feelings on the matter.
When it ends poorly, Ryuji feels guilty for pushing Taiga to make amends. Ryuji’s own agenda blinds him from what is actually happening in his friends’ lives due to his own internal issues, whether he realizes it or not. It is possible that Ryuji’s inner longing for a father and complete family is why he is constantly trying to fix things and take care of others. He tends to act more like a parent than a teenage boy as he is constantly cooking and cleaning to take care of his mother, who doesn’t seem to take life seriously.
While his mother has a carefree and childlike mindset, Ryuji is constantly bent out of shape at even the smallest setbacks, much like an overly-stressed adult.
Love And Growth
Throughout the series we see Taiga and Ryuji’s relationship grow in many ways; though it sometimes comes across as unhealthy and somewhat toxic. Taiga regularly puts too much onto Ryuji and will react violently if he does something that she doesn’t like. Meanwhile, Ryuji is lost in his own world where he places the burden of having to take care of everyone on his shoulders alone, leaving him clueless about what he truly wants out of life or a relationship. He is also often tuned out to his loved ones’ problems and emotions, despite his constant care-taking nature.
The Bond And Breaking Point
It is shown throughout the series how different Taiga and Ryuji act towards each other as opposed to their crushes, proving the difference between a simple crush and real first love. Taiga and Ryuji overcome many obstacles together throughout the series as they become each other’s main source of comfort. This leads to a turning point in the series where both realize that they actually hold very strong feelings towards each other rather than their initial crushes. They become each other’s first love without even realizing, and from there they are left to make sense of their feelings for each other.
Ryuji and Taiga have been putting their feelings for each other on the back-burner for the sake of others. When Ryuji finally realizes what he wants (to be with Taiga), he faces an obstacle that he can’t control, leaving him to react differently than he normally would. The strain on both of their situations activates a fight or flight response, and the two decide to run away from their overbearing parents and elope, instead of facing their stressors.
It’s clear that Taiga has put her complete trust in Ryuji, as she doesn’t seem to doubt his erratic decision. Because both of them grew up in broken homes, they seem to fear the thought of losing one another, which why they believe that running away together is the only logical answer at the time.
Riding Out The Storm Together
After being away from home for a literal day, the two have had time to clear their heads, and Ryuji begins to come back to his senses about running away. Taiga fears that everything has fallen apart, including their elopement plans, and seems to hold a deeply rooted fear of abandonment due to her parental issues. She most likely has a small fear that Ryuji will abandon her as well, or that she will lose him in some way.
Though Taiga is concerned for their future, Ryuji is there to bring her back to reality and promotes a positive outlook on it. Ryuji’s feelings for Taiga are strong, and he never wants her to doubt his love for her. He constantly expresses to Taiga how much he loves her and reassures her that he will always be there. Ryuji tells Taiga that he still plans on marrying her, but says he wants to do it the right way with blessings from both of their families and their friends. This goes back to Ryuji’s broken home life and how his father left his mother pregnant and unwed before he was born.
Ryuji wants to do right by Taiga, unlike how his father treated his mother. Despite her life being full of broken promises, Taiga wholeheartedly trusts Ryuji, as he’s always looked out for her best interest. This has been shown time and time again, and Taiga trusts Ryuji enough to make the mutual decision to return home and face their problems head-on together. These are actions that go beyond even first love and leave Ryuji and Taiga now on a more committed level.
Love And Self Sacrifice
Ryuji has always treated Taiga like she is important and cared for as she continued to bond with him and his mother. Taiga’s broken home life often made her feel small and alone, and her parents didn’t seem to care enough to spend time with her or show her love. This healthy connection with Ryuji and his family has slowly changed her negative outlook on life and relationships as she and Ryuji continued to grow closer.
When Taiga realizes how much she cares for Ryuji, she begins to think seriously about his own wellbeing. Normally selfish and spoiled, she puts her feelings aside in order for Ryuji to thrive and be happy. Taiga makes a huge decision to make a healthy change not just for her, but for Ryuji also. She expresses this later in a letter to Ryuji, explaining that she wants to become a better person; not only so she can be proud of herself, but so that she could also love him better.
The Reoccurring Theme Of Fate
The title of the anime foreshadows Ryuji and Taiga’s endgame relationship but is often lost in translation with English speaking audiences. Toradora is a literal combination of the Japanese words for dragon and tiger, the two animals that represent Ryuji and Taiga, and are a reoccurring theme in the show.
The symbol of the tiger and dragon is a consistent comparison to Ryuji and Taiga’s personalities. Ryuji mentions at the beginning of the series that he is a dragon and Taiga is a tiger, and only dragons and tigers can stand equal to each other. Taiga later expresses that they are each other’s equals and meant to be together. This seems to be a nod to the Japanese legend of the red string of fate, where lovers are bound by destiny regardless of circumstance. Ryuji and Taiga were bound by destiny to be each other’s first love and beyond.
Taiga reinforces this notion and tells Ryuji that they aren’t like anyone else and that they have always been destined to be together. After everything Ryuji and Taiga have gone through in the series, their bond managed to hold against all odds, proving that they are in fact soulmates. This moment of realization and the growth that continued to follow has put Ryuji and Taiga’s relationship on a higher level, as it is clear that they are simply not just each other’s first love, but soulmates.
Metaphorically, Ryuji, and Taiga could also simply symbolize the power of first love, and how the experience is impossible to forget. Everyone remembers their first crush, their first kiss, and the feelings surrounding the first love. With all of the lovable silliness aside, Toradora holds all of those fond feelings of first love as a teenager, while also portraying healthy ways to cope with real-life issues. The anime also shows that there is a difference between just having a first love type of crush and actually loving someone.
Ryuji and Taiga brought out the best in each other, which helped them both grow not only as a couple but as individuals. When faced with difficult obstacles, Ryuji and Taiga go against the first love norm. They manage to overcome all of their problems together, regardless of circumstance. Toradora shows that sometimes it takes a little more effort to get what the heart not only wants but what it needs.
Is The Portrayal Of First Love Realistic?
The way anime portrays first love can be highly unrealistic in some ways. Oftentimes TV tends to glamorize certain things to make them look more appealing than they actually are in real life. Anime tends to exaggerate emotions and situations; and most of the time there is a happy ending where the high school sweethearts get married and live happily ever after. This can warp an adolescents’ world view of love and how relationships are supposed to work, leading to disappointment and possibly unsatisfying relationships down the road. The theme of soulmates is reoccurring and is up to the viewer whether they find this concept to be true or not.
However, there are positive things about the first love portrayal in anime. For those who have experienced first love, it’s a refreshing dose of something from long ago. For those who have yet to experience first love, it brings about exciting anticipation. First love portrayal in anime also gives off a feeling of hope and positivity. It emphasizes that there is someone out there for everyone, even if they don’t realize it or know it yet. And though teens shouldn’t be looking to anime or movies for real romantic advice, it is perfectly okay to set standards for love, so long as it’s realistic.